Bottom 10 Movies of 2013

And so with the top 10 films of 2013 comes the worst of the year. Think of this as a public announcement. AVOID THE FOLLOWING FILMS!

10. Dark Skies

A pitiful attempt at horror.

9. The Fifth Estate

Two hours of mindless boredom.

8. Pain and Gain

Michael Bay proves that he doesn’t need fighting robots and/or explosions to be bad.

7 A Good Day to Die Hard

Bruce Willis kills the legacy of John McClane even more in the fifth installment to the Die Hard franchise. That’s right, it’s a franchise now.

6. This is The End

You’ll wish it was as you watch a bunch of pretentious A Listers dick around for an hour and a half.

5. Blue is the Warmest Colour

Blue is the DULLEST colour

4. The Host

It’s only fitting that an adaptation of a Stephanie Meyer book makes the list for a second year running…

3. Mama

Not even Jennifer Lawrence can save this.

2. Upstream Color

Apparently there’s a message in this?

Movie 43

10 times as many big names than This Is The End and 10 times as worse.


Top 10 Movies of 2013

It’s that time of the year again folks! With 2014 only a few hours away what better way to end 2013 than by summing up the year’s top 10 films! 

The year has been filled with so many fantastic films to feast your eyes on that it’s hard to pick 10 let alone put them in order. But I’ll try my best. 

10. The Lone Ranger

Johnny Depp and Armie Hammer make a great duo in Gore Verbinski’s latest offering. 2 and a half hours of pure fun no matter what the press says. It’s the best substitute we have for Hammer playing Batman for now at least.

9. Stand Up Guys

What looked like a terrible comedy with a few classic actors thrown into the centre for good measure actually turned out to be a heartwarming film which proves that Pacino’s still got what it takes to entertain us. Even after his career’s near death experience in Jack and Jill…

8. Stoker

Park Chan Wook gives us drop dead gorgeous shots in his first English Language film, with Mia Wasikowska and Matthew Goode giving great performances and Prison Break’s Wentworth Miller proving he’s not just a pretty face with his first script.

7. The World’s End

Edgar Wright brings his Blood and Ice Cream trilogy to a fantastic end which will have you craving Cornetto’s once more.

6. Trance

Danny Boyle manages to twist and turn until the very end in a film that will keep you on the edge of your seat

5. The Purge

A great premise for a slasher film which deserves a sequel.

4. Frozen

Disney’s take on The Snow Queen finally makes an appearance and does not disappoint. It’ll have you singing the soundtrack for weeks to come.

3. Gravity

If you didn’t manage to see this on the biggest screen you could then you missed out dearly. It’s not just a film, it’s an immersive experience which will grab your attention and not let go until well after the credits roll.

2. In Fear

A thrilling game of cat and mouse in the Irish country side makes for the most terrifying experience of the year. 

1. Django Unchained

Released in January in the UK and still 12 months later nothing has come close to the excitement that this brought. Call me biased if you must but Tarantino remains a God.